I am all He says I am…

11 Apr

This birthday was different to the FEW that I have celebrated before. Don’t get me wrong, it was beautiful and insightful in its own special way. In my parents house, and even now that I’m an adult, birthdays are big deals! I still get asked what’s in my birthday wish list (which I think about for months beforehand) but the list gets shorter with each passing year and for the last three years, it hasn’t changed. See babe, I’m not high to maintain. Having said all of that, I do however have the blessing and privilege of sharing my birthday with my mother, well it’s more the case that she gets to share hers with me, either way, I wouldn’t trade it for a thing.
My day was filled with the usual phone calls from family and friends, Facebook posts that made me feel so special because someone took the time to say 2 little words. That means a lot in the busy world that we live in! Sam had swimming lessons that afternoon and hubby had a PTA meeting that evening so there wasn’t a candlelit dinner or any fireworks but some lights did come on…. Let me explain.
For a while now, I have said that I do not believe in coincidence. I do believe that with hard work and prayer, if my hearts desires are realized that is amazing, but equally, if they don’t then God is still good and His plans for my life will lead me into the paths that I need to take. There’s a lot that I am praying and trusting God for but I don’t always live from that place of rest in Him and His goodness. I don’t make New Years resolutions but I have come to challenge myself to live what I profess, and if my profession is that I trust Him then that should show up in how I act and in what I say.
My hubby asked me at the end of my day (when he finally came home) how it felt to be my age? First of all, a lady never reveals how young she is. And secondly, I’m not sure if it’s all these twenties that I hang around with at varsity but I certainly do not feel my age… Except when I go out all night long (like I did recently) and it took me about two days to recover, hahaha. Apart from that, I have come into my own in terms of feeling comfortable with myself, my warts, my hopes and dreams, my downfalls and failures. I am my own package deal and I dig me. I’ve found my own two feet, expressing my spirituality and that has made the biggest difference to me thus far. I love the journey that I’m on with God, His insights, His leanings, His mysteries but more than anything is His unconditional and unending love. He cares about the details of my life!!! That’s the kinds of things that were on my mind on the day of my birthday.
In 1 Kings 19, the bible tells the story of Elijah. He was running away from people who wanted to murder him and in his time of need, God was not in the wind, earth quake or fire. God was in a still small voice. So while we are looking for an external display, or a sign, or even for someone else to affirm us, I’ve come to understand that I am His dearly beloved one and so is every creature in the known universe. We are all precious to Him, and if we allow Him to, He’ll take such pleasure in telling us and showing us for the rest of our days.
About not believing in coincidences, I’ve come across a Buddhist proverb that says: “when the student is ready, the teacher will appear” and I have found that certain books, readings, scriptures, teachings, music and much more has come into my path and fallen into my lap because I’m more open than I used to be. I had a particular song on repeat in my car throughout my day and here are the beautiful lyrics that I want to share with you. I hope you allow them to penetrate the depths of your soul and come to KNOW the One who is nothing but goodness, mercy and love.

All He Says I Am” Lyrics by Gateway Worship | from the album Forever Yours

He whispers in my ear
Tells me that I’m fearless

He shares a melody
Tells me to repeat it
And it makes me whole
It reminds my soul

I am all He says I am
I am all He says I am
I am all He says I am
And He says I am His own

I was blinded by scales upon my eyes
Then He came like a light
And burned up all the lies
He set me free
He reminded me

I am all He says I am
I am all He says I am
I am all He says I am
An He says I am His own

Chains are broken
Scales are on the floor
Truth is spoken
I’m no orphan anymore

I am loved
I am new again
I am free
I’m no slave to sin
I’m saint
I am righteousness
I’m alive

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